Welcome to Dying for Retail on Black Friday

Driving in the pitch black of my town around 6:30 am, I made my way steadily towards my place of employment.  Every other business in town was still closed.  But as I got closer, I saw the parking lot lights shining brightly through the trees.  And what did I see once I turned the corner?A mass of cars that should only belong there once the midday sun has risen.  I got out of my car, pulling a black button-down shirt on over my white polo in the morning chill with these words running through my head with the greatest of ironies, "Wear it proudly.  This is what you're working for today."

I entered the store to find it busier than I ever have in my life.  I worked for nearly eight hours. And rarely did the lines let up.  Today went faster than it ever has.  And a couple of my customers even agreed with me that things only get ugly when people get impatient. Because after all, it's only stuff. They won't die if they don't get it.

Welcome to working retail on Black Friday.

Already at his place of employment, a Wal-Mart employee watched as the crowds massed outside the door.  He and five other employees tried to block the doors so that the crowds wouldn't jump the gun.  But they did anyway.  They literally broke down the doors and started running in a few minutes before 5 a.m. so they could get to the sales.

The man was thirty-four years old, and they trampled him.  They trampled him to his death. He was pronounced dead only an hour later.

Welcome to working retail on Black Friday.

What has become of us?  It's only stuff.  You won't die if you don't get it. But apparently you're willing to kill for it. And that is the most despicable thing of all.

Will I See Heaven in Mine?

Highlight of my day:  The realization that I only have one course left to really worry about.

Two others may as well be completely finished.  And the other two I only have one "big" thing left for each, neither of which am I worried about.

Also, Coldplay continues to fascinate me.  They have a new EP out entitled "Prospekt's March". The song "Glass of Water" is awe-inspiring. Go listen if you haven't.

And so, what shall I tell you today, besides the aforementioned?

Shall I tell you I'm working Black Friday?  Shall I tell you that I had an incredible time at dinner tonight just talking with my family?  Shall I tell you that I shared a picture of a scantily clad model to a classroom full of males as part of a presentation I made today (and I happened to be the only girl in said class) to persuade them to use recycled paper?  Shall I tell you what I plan on doing for my final project in Web Design?

No.  I don't think I shall tell you about any of those things.

Instead, I think I shall tell you of the glory it will be to finally see Jesus face to face.  Because it is the one thing that has been on my mind today.  We all have our images of Him in our minds, and the ones people have created for us (which I tend to shun for some reason).  But this is a different image.  I wondered first if I would see the holes in His hands and feet and sides.  Then I wondered what color hair He would have (for I read a book once that depicted Him with blonde hair... but we won't get into details).  I never pictured His earthly being as anything incredible to admire. Because, in fact, it probably was not.  I don't say it to be mean. I say it to be fact.  Because many of us probably feel our own fleshy bodies leave something (or a great many somethings) to be desired. But a Heavenly being?  Have you ever inspired the thought in yourself?  Or maybe it wasn't me who inspired this thought to think about in the first place.  It may very well have been the Spirit.  All I know is that I do not know what He'll look like (I know, convenient for some of you - however you would like to interpret 'convenient').  But it will be beautiful.  More beautiful than anything I have ever laid eyes on.  But the best part?

I can just smile at Him, and He'll smile back, and He'll know everything I was thinking, both good and bad, and we'll know He already took it with Him to the cross.

The Void

I find myself working for the void.  I find myself a prospective employee of a company that, for years, I was never incredibly keen on.  The only reason I'd be willing to work for them is because my parents once did.  But are they proud of it?  What would I be doing for them?  How would I be bettering God's kingdom by working for this company?  I don't know.

How can I work for Him?  Where can I work for Him?  What can I do to prove to the world that I am for His end, and no one else's?  How can I show my allegiance to Him but then continue to obtain my sustenance from other places than Him?

I continually find myself being sucked into the void.  The void that knows it's fun to get new things.  The void that says it's more important to complete homework for an institution than to complete homework He gave me.  The void that creeps into my mind that causes me to say, "Yeah, He still exists, but we'll get back to Him tomorrow.  Once I've crawled out of the void."

How can I control this void?  Truly, I cannot.  But how can I pray for guidance when the void doesn't want me to, and I've succumbed to the void?

I should be succumbing to Him, not the void.  Oh you void with your pretty lights, your colors, your music, your temptations.  You void-things of material bliss that seem never-ending.  How can I tell myself these things are for not?  How can I live right by them, but not be sustained by them?  They don't sustain.  They're a rickety support, doomed to fail.

Lord, give me your eyes.  Give me your eyes to avoid the void.  Tell me the void is for not.  Show me your open door that is for.  Interest me in the things that would please you most.  Push these interests on me like the world pushes their own interests on me.  Make your interests mine.  The You in me wants nothing else.  And the me in me knows that is the way it should be.

But the void keeps creeping in, distracting me.

Procrastinatorator

I have a film analysis due in approximately 34 hours.  I've only written the synopsis.  Why does it seem like this whole semester has been a delicate balance between just getting the darn homework done, and procrastinating out the wazoo?  I haven't a clue.  I'm just very glad there are only three weeks left.  Then, as always happens, I can have a whole month to decide that I actually miss being busy and constantly strapped for time.

It snowed more today, and it was thrilling.  Seeing the white beautifulness on the ground - not to mention fluttering happily through the air - made my day.  I worked on Monday.  Someone referred to it as God's dandruff.  It registered in my mind as a slight insult at the time, though I didn't say that to her.  I was tempted to comment here on it further, but I think I'll just leave it at a bad analogy.

Keep bringing the snow.  I loves it.

First Snow of Fall/Winter '08

I awoke to snow falling this morning.  It was lovely.  Occasionally, I do not prefer driving in snow. But this morning, it was quite refreshing (since I haven't since last winter).  That, and the roads really weren't that bad.  The rest of the day was lovely as well.  There would be breaks in the actual act of the snow, well, snowing. But much to my delight, it would always begin again.

There are three more weeks of school until the semester is finished.  Oh, how I hope it goes well.

Oh, and I took the liberty (since I can) of creating a new header.  I was tempted to word it "coughing Christmas style", and on any other blog I probably would have.  But, I plan on keeping it up, approximately, 'til New Years.  So "holiday" was a more appropriate title.

Elections, Offenses, Green Printing

1) Barack Obama was elected the 44th president of the United States.  He is also the first black man to assume the post.  He also happens to be a self-proclaimed "mutt", which tells me he isn't afraid of his heritage (nor should anyone else be - of his, or their own).

2) Due to my faith, I was challenged (by more than one person) on whom I should be voting for in the Presidential election.  They felt it was, shall we say (and in not so many words), unChristian of me to vote for a party that is known for being more liberal than many of us would like.

3) But it got to the extent that one of them essentially challenged my faith altogether.  He claimed I had pseudo-faith.

4) The whole point of my entire life has become the desire to worship God, and do His work - not to have pseudo-faith.  Needless to say, I was greatly offended by the fact that said person thought I had pseudo-faith.

5) I have very tainted, human faith - nowhere near the perfection God expects.  It is a struggle - but it is a struggle that even the most faithful battle with every day.  But I refuse to believe that because I am less than perfect that I have pseudo-faith.

6) On a lighter note, I've become a fan of the free iTunes downloads.  Not all of them, but I have taken to liking several of the alternative and Christian genre songs.

7) Go check out donotmail.org.  Educate yourself on how much junk mail is actually sent out every year to the United States alone, and what you can do to stop (or for the time being reduce) it.  The statistics are staggering, incredibly disgusting, and will actually make for quite excellent information in my technical report on Green Printing, and why everyone should recycle their paper. (It doesn't biodegrade as fast as you think it does!)

8) To quote John Green, my new favorite author even though I've only read one of his three books - "Best wishes!"